


The Death of a Crow

by Symxalia



Series: Once More, With Feeling [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Akechi Goro has a Palace, Child Abuse, Dreams and Nightmares, Events Changed Because of Time Travel, M/M, Major Spoilers for all of Persona 5, New Game Plus, Pre-Relationship Polythieves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-06-20 08:09:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15529884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Symxalia/pseuds/Symxalia
Summary: When someone changes to the point of being unrecognizable is the person they used to be still alive?If not, then Akira is determined to bring about the death of Akechi Goro.





	1. If a Teenager has a Breakdown in the Middle of the City, and Nobody is Around to Hear, do They Make a Sound

**Author's Note:**

> This work used to be posted under the name Akechi Dies (in a good way)  
> Due to an emergency, that instance of the fic had to be deleted temporarily.  
> If you read Akechi Dies and now you're here, thanks for coming back!  
> if this is your first time seeing this fic thank you for clicking! feel free to stay a while!.

 “Ah! Akechi-kun! It’s nice to see you, welcome to Leblanc”

 

Kurusu looks up from the counter he was wiping down and instantly smiles at Goro, the boy is struck immediately by how blinding it is and looks away, blushing lightly, how strange it is, to be greeted like a friend.

 

“Customer service doesn’t suit you at all Kurusu” it really does, but he can’t say that or Kususu will start to think Goro _likes_ him, or something equally ridiculous.

 

“You don’t think so? And here I thought I was just getting the hang of it” Kurusu winks at him, honest to god _winks_ at _him_ , if Goro thought he was blushing before he was clearly wrong, _this_ is what blushing is.

 

He takes a deep breath before snarkily replying “Hardly”

 

At that, the cafe lapses into silence, and Goro has to wonder where Sojiro is, why he left the cafe to Kurusu’s hands today. He looks around, noticing that there are no other patrons, though that’s nothing unusual. Kurusu places a coffee he didn’t have the chance to order in front of him, Goro sips it hesitantly.

 

He’s not sure what’s gotten into him today, he feels like the walls he’s kept up for so long are cracking and crumbling, it must be Leblanc and it’s unfairly calming atmosphere.

 

“It seems my mother was in a relationship with a lowlife of a man,” what the fuck is he doing, he didn’t want to talk about this.

 

“He quickly discarded her once he found out she was pregnant” he clenches his fist at this, still internally panicking, but his anger over his disgusting father slowly overtaking it, pushing him to keep going.

 

As he continues, he feels a burden being lessened, Kurusu’s eyes softening at him, “That despair led to her death” perhaps he can use this, despite his dislike of sharing, fabricating a tragic backstory would help him with his plan in the long run. If he gets the phantom thieves’ leader to trust him, it will be all that much easier to strike when the time comes.

 

“Thanks to him I was passed from foster home to foster home,” he can’t help but let some of his resentment slip into his voice at this, Kurusu’s eyes light up in recognition, perhaps his situation is similar?

 

Goro’s voice cracks during his next sentence, dammit “But I do quite well by myself these days” Kurusu doesn’t look convinced, he’s not quite sure what he’s thinking.

 

“Ah, perhaps I have said too much. anyway, I saw that medjed was defeated. I suppose congratulations are in order? That does mean the change of heart worked, correct?” he’s honestly a bit excited to hear the results, this partnership between him and the phantom thieves has been quite educational in regards to the metaverse.

 

“It did, she’s on the road to recovery now” Akira says Goro’s relief was palpable, he could only imagine what Kurusu might see on his face in that moment.

 

“...” Kurusu is looking at him, considering him, Goro feels a shiver up his spine, like an ant under a magnifying glass.

 

“Actually Akechi-kun, I had a question about Futaba’s palace,” Goro doesn’t like that at all, the way Kurusu is tip-toeing in his words makes him nervous. Ironic, since the phantom thief is at his most dangerous when he’s confident.

 

Meeting Kurusu’s eyes Goro says, “I’m sure you know more about the palace than I do Kurusu, but I’ll do my best to answer whatever you may ask”

 

“What happened during the boss fight?” Ah, he was hoping no-one noticed. Kurusu’s frankly idiotic code does nothing to stop Goro from tensing at the question.

 

“I’m not sure what you mean, could you perhaps be more specific?” please do not, please just drop the topic Kurusu.

 

Needless to say, mental begging did nothing to curb the thief's determined curiosity. “I think you do know, but for both of our sanities, I’ll spell it out,”

 

“Please do”

 

“Why did you have a panic attack when we confronted cognitive Wakaba Isshiki?” Goro was afraid of this... well, all the better to wrap Kurusu around his finger.

 

“It reminded me of… some of the less pleasant foster homes I’ve been in” partially true, but all of the best _lies_ are. He doesn’t realize he’s curled into himself until Kurusu lays his hand on Goro’s shoulder, reaching awkwardly over the counter, Goro tenses. Kurusu is quick to pull away when he notices.

 

“Hey, hey, it’s alright, thank you for sharing that with me” Kurusu smiles kindly at him and Goro feels sick, he needs to get out of here. The place where Kurusu’s hand rested on him _burns_.

 

“do you want me to refill your coffee?” thank whatever deities out there that Goro is able to keep his mask in place long enough to rise out of his chair and turn away.

 

“No, thank you Kurusu, I must be off, perhaps next time,” at this he picks up his briefcase and walks to the door, not even waiting for Kurusu’s reply.

 

* * *

 

Akira watches Akechi rush through Leblanc’s door feeling like he understands him better. He wishes he could have convinced Goro to keep talking, but the information he’s learned is enough for now. He looks around Leblanc. He’s pretty sure Akechi would not have been quite so open if he had known Leblanc was bugged.

 

However, this makes the next part of his plan easier, as long as he’s right about this. He walks upstairs after flipping the sign to closed, it’s almost time for closing anyway, Boss won't be mad at him for a few lost minutes.

 

Upstairs he pulls out his phone, tapping on the once eerie app, he’s gotten used to it by now, to the point that it’s oddly comforting. It pulls up quickly and is ready for input. Akira takes a steadying breath,

 

“Goro Akechi” a beat, then,

 

“Target found”

 

* * *

 

“So leader, what did you bring us all here for? And where’s Akechi?” Ann says, lounging in her usual spot in the couch, her phone nonchalantly laying on the couch next to her, waiting to be sat on, probably

 

“I have some new information, I think we should doing something about it,” he pulls out his phone, opening the metaverse app to show off his findings.

 

“Akechi Goro” The team collectively holds their breath, waiting for the app to respond. Even though Akira already knows the results, he joins them, half worried that last night was just an extremely realistic hallucination.

 

“Target Found” the voice of the Nav causes the team to gasp, Akira lets out a silent breath of relief, only to immediately feel guilty afterwards.

 

“Dude what the Fuck!? Akechi has a palace? I mean, I knew that guy was shady but a _Palace_?” Ryuji’s voice breaks the silence left behind by the robotic voice of the nav, explosive as always.

 

“Evidently, he does, though I guess you wouldn’t be able to infer that from the app saying ‘target found’ would you Ryuji” Morgana says, going straight for the kill as always. At least he looks sheepish after Akira glares at him.

 

“Akira, am I correct in assuming that you mean we should infiltrate Akechi-san’s palace?” Yusuke says, bringing them back on topic.

 

“exactly”

 

Makoto has a slightly sour look on her face, “But why? He seems fine to me,”  Akira almost sighs, almost.

 

“I’m okay with it, he always has just a few too many walls up for me to think he’s actually okay” Ann says, emotionally perceptive as always, “plus, if Akira brought it up, it must be important,”

 

“Actually guys, about that,” Futaba starts hesitantly, she looks unsteady when their eyes turn to her, “Last Night Akechi came into the cafe, he said some concerning stuff while talking to Akira, so I did some digging-”

 

Makoto interrupts, “That’s a violation of his privacy Futaba,”  

 

“I know, but this was important. As I was saying,”

 

Futaba starts explaining like she’s giving a book report, “He used to be in the foster care system, judging by his medical records at the time, which were difficult to find by the way, he wasn’t treated well at all, eight hospital visits over ten years, all of them for serious injuries”

 

“He _used_ to be in foster care? Isn’t he still a minor?” Yusuke says, placing his hand on his chin in thought.

 

Futaba pushes up her glasses and grins “That’s where the weird part is, he was adopted by a person that doesn’t exist”

 

Ryuji throws his hands up in the air out of confusion, it’s cute “A person who doesn’t exist? How could that be possible?”

 

“I’m not sure, but all of the records were falsified, they were hidden pretty well too!” at this her chest puffs out, prideful. “But that’s not the point! I think he could be in trouble!”

 

Makoto shakes her head, “I don’t see how some old medical records and a secretive adoption is reason to alter someone’s cognition”

 

Akira cuts in then, he expected some level of hesitance from his team, now he just has to convince them without giving too much away, this should be easy, _not_.

 

“I think his Palace may be similar to Futaba’s, distorted from trauma, not from any desires like our previous targets”

 

“But, with Futaba, she asked us to change her heart, wouldn’t we be violating Akechi’s privacy going into his heart without that permission?” She sounds vaguely distressed, Akira can’t quite put his finger on why.

 

“Makoto why are you so against this? Shouldn’t we trust Akira?” Ryuji defends, Akira’s touched that he’s standing up for him. Makoto seems to tense at the question towards her motives though, she avoids answering it.

 

“I just don’t think we should be rash about this, who knows what could happen to a persona user if we steal their treasure”

 

“Then let’s take this slowly!” Morgana speaks up for the first time since this conversation started, sending a pointed gaze at Akira, the boy in question isn’t sure what to make of that.

 

“Pardon?”

 

“It will take a while for us to find his key words, so why not we look for them, and _then_ decide to go into the palace or not” Akira’s not sure he likes whatever Morgana is thinking, but if he convinces Makoto, Akira’s fine with not quashing whatever it is right this moment.

 

“Alright let’s put it to a vote, all in favor of searching for Akechi-kun’s keywords?” everyone raises their hands, though Makoto seems to do so begrudgingly.

 

“Then, let’s get started”

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've gotten this far then I have to thank you for reading!  
> Have any questions? Want to tell me your favorite part? Just want to yell at me?  
> I'd love to see you in the comments!


	2. Satan or Sex, Both Bad for Selling Apartments

“Dammit! We’ve tried everything man!” Ryuji loudly complains, “Tv station, pancake house, tokyo, you name it, why is this so hard!” Ryuji is lounging on Akira’s couch with his hands pressed to his eyes, the rest of the thieves are in similar states of disarray, Akira reaches over from the workbench, where he was making infiltration tools,  and puts his hand in Ryuji’s hair and ruffles it, he’ll need to touch up the roots soon.

 

“Complaining isn’t going to help anything Ryuji” Makoto scolds, she’s sitting on Akira’s bed, looking the most composed of all of them.

 

“He does have a point though, we’ve said so many places, my head is starting to turn into mush” Ann says, and then, like a particularly large cat, flops over Makoto in boredom, Akira chuckles at the comparison. Makoto is seemingly unaffected by the blond in her lap, her hand moving to rest on Ann’s head.

 

“I hungerrrr, I’m going downstairs to get some of Sojiro’s curry” Futaba bounces up and leaps over Ann from where she was laying on the bed behind Makoto, bounding towards the staircase with an energy that shouldn’t be allowed.

 

“Is it alright if I join you? I do not think I remembered to eat today,” Yusuke says, his hands resting over his stomach, a sketchbook with the thieves in various positions laying on the ground next to him.

 

“Obviously Inari, Sojiro wouldn’t turn down a hungry kid, plus, he likes you” At this, Yusuke stands, following Futaba down the stairs

 

It didn’t start out like this, when the thieves (sans Akechi) first came to Leblanc this afternoon, they were full of energy, rapidly firing off locations for the nav to pick up, But, as time dragged on and they weren’t any closer to finding the keywords, they lost their enthusiasm. At this point Akira half expects someone to throw his phone at the wall if the nav says “No candidates found” again. In interest of not having a shattered phone screen, he grabs it from where it sits on the table to pick up their conversation.

 

“Is it time for us to head out?” Ann says, almost as if she read his mind, however he’s not exactly complaining, now he doesn’t need to bring it up himself. He nods.

 

“Oh! I did not realize how late it had gotten, I need to get home to make dinner for Sae” Makoto looks like she wants to jump up, but a certain twin-tailed girl in her lap is preventing her from doing so. Makoto seems to suddenly realize the situation she’s in and flushes. Ann doesn’t notice her internal panic though, and leisurely lifts herself off her not-so-unwilling captive. Makoto stands up and brushes off her skirt the moment she’s free, gathering her things.

 

Ann gets up as well, fixing her hair, “I’ll walk with you to the station Makoto! Us girls gotta stick together right?” her voice sounds a bit stiff, Akira notes, similar to when she’s acting, but that’s none of his business, he watches the two of them leave. The only two thieves left in the room with him, Ryuji and napping Morgana, don’t seem to be leaving anytime soon, which suits him just fine.

 

Akira heads downstairs to see Yusuke and Futaba arguing about the aesthetics of Featherman again and smiles. rather than get involved, he dishes some curry for himself and Ryuji. He walks back upstairs quietly, leaving Yusuke and Futaba to their bickering, plates of curry balanced in his hands. 

 

* * *

 

Ryuji and Akira are alone in the darkened attic of Leblanc. Morgana left earlier with a yelled “you think I was napping just for the fun of it? I have work to do tonight!” as he jumped out of the window, Akira assured him he won’t be back for a while, if, he returns by morning at all.

 

So, Ryuji has his arms wrapped around his boyfriend, making up for the time they lost while around their friends. One of his hands buried in Akira’s hair, detangling it while running his fingers through it. Akira looks like he’s ready to fall asleep, which isn’t good, because Ryuji wanted to talk to him tonight. He stops petting Akira’s hair and pats his shoulder to get his attention, “Hey Akira, why do you want to do this palace so much? we barely know Akechi,” Ryuji asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

Akira tenses in his arms, pulling his face back from Ryuji’s chest, there’s something oddly vulnerable on Akira’s face, in his voice, “I don’t-” he hesitates, his hands gripping Ryuji’s sleep shirt tightly as if to ground himself, considering his answer, Ryuji leans down and kisses his cheek, encouraging him to speak, “I just... I get the feeling that if we don’t save him now, we won’t get the chance later, like we might  _ lose _ the chance to save him” he seems to notice what he’s doing after he gets his answer out, his hands slowly relax their grip, he buries his face back into Ryuji and pulls him closer than before.

 

“Does it scare you? The thought of losing him?”

 

Akira flinches in his arms, but laughs shakily, “am I really that obvious?”

 

Ryuji laughs and ruffles Akira’s hair, revenge for earlier, when Akira did this same to him. It drags out a giggle from Akira, which makes him smile. “Not really, you just get this glint in your eye when you look at him. It made me jealous at first, but I remembered what we talked about, that you were still gonna be mine, even if you were someone else’s too.” he wishes he could see Akira’s eyes, “I just want you to be happy, Akira” he kisses the top of Akira’s head and hugs him.

 

If Ryuji feels tears leaking through his shirt as Akira laughs, nobody needs to know. “I love you Ryuji” Akira says through wet hiccups, Ryuji just goes back to petting Akira’s hair and holding him close.

 

“I love you too Akira”

 

* * *

 

Akechi wandering into Leblanc one evening while Akira is on shift is nothing unusual, what is unusual however, is the detective’s state of health, Akira’s half tempted to throw him out immediately. He looks  _ so  _ sick. Akira isn’t quite sure how even got out of bed, let alone ride the train to Leblanc. Akira suppresses the urge to send him back home and looks over at Sojiro, who’s just noticed Akechi as well, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

 

“Jesus kid, did you get hit by a truck?” It’s not a incorrect comparison to make, with Akechi’s eye-bags that look like bruises and skin so pale it could be mistaken for blood loss, blunt force trauma doesn’t seem too far off.

 

“Not at all sir, though I may look like it. I won’t be here for very long, I just wanted to get some coffee before heading back home to continue my paperwork” He says it quietly, like Boss might get mad at him if he says for any longer than a few minutes.

 

“You’re  _ working _ like that?” Sojiro sounds incredulous, Akechi winces at the volume. Sorry Akechi, Rest In Peace, Sojiro has entered Dad Mode™ and now, there is no escape.

 

“Yes sir..?” it sounds like a question, his voice quiet and raspy, he looks worried that Sojiro is going to yell at him. Akira wonders who got mad at him for being sick in the past to warrant Akechi’s reactions.

 

Sojiro rubs and the bridge of his nose under his glasses, he looks like he’s just realized that by taking in one kid, he’s managed to somehow take in four more, Akira almost laughs, almost. Sojiro turns around and heads to the kitchen, leaving words behind him, “Damn, kid. sit down, I’ll get you some curry,” This isn’t a suggestion, and Akechi seems to realize that, since he sits down at the counter almost immediately, reminding Akira of a puppet whose strings have been cut. 

 

Akira starts to make tea, deciding that Akechi shouldn’t be drinking coffee while he’s like this. when he sets a mug down in front of Akechi he receives a glare, as if not furthering his caffeine addiction was a great crime. “Kurusu, I assure you I am  _ fine _ ” his voice cracks on the word fine and Akira grins at him.

 

Akechi takes a sip of the tea vindictively, not noticing Sojiro’s return from the kitchen. He jumps when a plate is set down in front of him, nearly spilling his drink. “Thank you Sakura-san, it smells delightful” he says, almost on instinct”

 

“None of that -san crap kid, just call me Boss” Sojiro’s voice is warm at this, much like Leblanc.

 

“Ah- alright then, thank you, Boss” Akechi looks a little uncomfortable as he amends his statement, even more so when Sojiro pats him on the shoulder afterwards. He eats slowly, savoring each bite, Akira has to wonder how long the student detective has gone without a substantial plate of food. 

 

“Akira, come help me unpack the boxes in the back,” boxes? Akira doesn’t remember any boxes in the kitchen, but he follows Sojiro nevertheless.

 

* * *

 

“Why, exactly, are you following me Kurusu?” Goro asks as they make their way down Yongen-Jaya’s backstreets. He’s walking slower than he normally would and his breathing is rougher than usual. He turns back to look at Kurusu, who is carrying a paper bag with… something in it, Goro’s not sure. 

 

“Boss told me to walk you home, since you look like you’d fall over if a baby bunny sneezed at you” Kurusu says infuriatingly, Goro huffs and looks away, not dignifying that with a response. The heat bearing down on the two feels like a physical weight. He adjusts his gloves, wishing to take them off as soon as possible, but with Kurusu around, it looks like that wish will remain unanswered. 

 

When they arrive to the station, he feels dizzy from the sun. Yongen-Jaya station is relatively crowded, about as crowded as it could be, given how small this district is. Goro isn’t even given the chance to prepare before he and Kurusu are boarding the train headed to his apartment. He ends up standing next to Kurusu, holding onto an overhead handle. His arm feels tired just from lifting it, god he’s pathetic, how did he even catch a cold in the middle of  _ summer _ .

 

The hum of the train is almost hypnotic, paired with gentle swaying, Goro finds himself drifting. He doesn’t notice the train come to a stop, what he does notice though, is some asshole bumping into him and throwing off his balance. Goro’s hand slips from the handle above him, his eyes widen and he’s  _ falling _ .

 

A pair of warm arms wrap around Goro’s waist before he can hit the ground or any unsuspecting passengers, pulling him back against and equally warm body. He looks back to see Kurusu’s insufferable smirk, one he usually reserves for the metaverse. 

 

“You alright detective?” He says, visibly holding back laughter, that bastard. 

 

“Alright Kurusu, you’ve made your point, you can let me go now” his cheeks are absolutely  _ not _ flushed from the proximity, it’s just the sickness. He looks back to where he used to be standing, only to find that one of the boarding passengers has taken his place, as well as the fact that there doesn’t seem to be another place for him to stand in the now crowded train car. 

 

Kurusu notices as well, leaning in so that Goro can hear his voice in the substantially louder crowd “I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” he unwraps one arm from Goro’s waist and grabs the overhead handle, “why not stay like this?” 

 

Before he can protest, the train starts moving again and Kurusu’s arm tightens around him, leaving no room for him to move. Goro would never admit it outloud, but Kurusu’s warmth against his aching body feels… nice. He finds himself relaxing into his grip.

 

* * *

 

“And here we are, Kurusu, you have successfully escorted me to my apartment” Akechi says, not without an ounce of spite in his voice. “You can now go back to whatever you were doing before you decided I needed a caretaker like a child,” Akira smiles sheepishly and holds up the bag in his hand.

 

“I have soup ingredients” he tilts his head at Goro “let me stay?” Akechi sighs heavily, but turns and enters his apartment building, waving at Akira to follow. Akira looks around briefly before following Akechi into what’s frankly an extremely rundown complex. He follows him into the elevator, Akechi punches the sixth button before leaning heavily on one of the rails. He looks worse than before, his cheeks are flushed high, a stark contrast to the pallor of his skin, his eyes look dazed and glassy. He almost looks like… Akira’s cheeks burn for a moment before he shakes his head furiously, Akechi is sick, he doesn’t need Akira staring at him.

 

Thankfully, the elevator pings, signalling their freedom and the doors roll open. The hallways looks old, the carpet patchy, it has stains Akira doesn’t want to think about. It doesn’t take long for them to get to Akechi’s door, apartment 669, the nine is centered lower than the other two numbers, as if it lost one of it’s screws, Akira stares at them curiously while Akechi opens the door, he’s fumbling with his keys, just another clue towards how badly he’s being affected by sickness right now.

 

Finally, he gets the door open, and Akira is treated to the sight of… a weirdly clean apartment. The only things laying around are Akechi’s briefcase, laptop, and coat, everything else is meticulously organized. Akechi takes off his shoes and puts them against the wall, Akira closes the door behind him and follows his example. 

 

“I don’t have time to entertain today Kurusu, I need to finish this paperwork” he strides to the table where his briefcase sits, his steps light. “If you’re insistent about staying to make soup, the kitchen is right there,” he points to his left, where the kitchen is separated from the main room by a breakfast counter. Akira watches as Akechi all but collapses at the table and decides to start the soup right away.

 

* * *

 

Akira was right about Akechi’s kitchen being bereft of food, earlier at Leblanc, but he made do, the chicken soup is simmering on the stove when he finally looks away from his task. Akechi is sitting at the table still, though sitting wouldn’t exactly be correct, he’s more _laying_ _on_ the table than _sitting_. His cheek pressed against the surface, closed eyes moving, he’s dreaming. Akira smiles fondly at him, and looks around for a blanket to use. 

 

The apartment really is baron, there’s a lonely bookshelf with academic books and a few novels, but nothing else sits on it. There are no photos anywhere, all of the walls bare of any signs that Akechi  _ lives _ outside of work and school. The tv is hooked up to cable, there are no other devices connected. Akira finds what he’s looking for in the closet with Akechi’s futon. After a moment’s deliberation, Akira lays out the futon for Akechi to lay in after eating. He grabs the blanket and drapes it over Akechi’s shoulders, he’s shivering now, that’s not good.

 

The soup has finished simmering by the time Akira checks on it. He nods to himself at the taste before ladling some into a bowl and carrying it delicately to the table. He shakes Akechi’s shoulder to wake him.

 

Akechi’s eyes  _ snap _ open and Akira is taken aback.

 

* * *

 

Goro is in a room with cold walls and a warm smile, a prick in his arm causes him to wince, harsh fluorescent lights glare in his eyes, making it hard for him to see detail. The woman in front of him feels  _ safe  _ though, Goro isn’t scared here. Slowly, everything fades away until the light is gone and Goro is in a void. The warmth disappeared with the light, he searches desperately in the darkness, to no avail. He’s completely alone. He drops down and clutches his legs, shivering. 

Footsteps sound behind him and Goro frantically looks in their direction, hoping for light, for the woman, instead he finds a girl, she’s very small, her hair is long and she reminds him of the woman, Goro’s heart seizes when he sees her. She opens her mouth to speak and Goro  _ remembers. _

 

_ “You killed her and left me alone” _

 

* * *

 

Akechi’s eyes are full of tears when he wakes, Akira quickly sets down the bowl, soup forgotten, he falls to his knees in front of Akechi, usure what to do to comfort him, Akechi wipes at his eyes like he’s trying to keep Akira from seeing his tears. Akira rests a hand on his back, rubbing soothingly. He ends up not needing to decide what to do, as Akechi falls into him and hugs him tightly. Akira returns the hug, letting a quiet question fill the air, “a nightmare?” He nods, “do you want to talk about it?” a shake of the head, “Okay,” so Akira sits there, in Akechi’s arms, rubbing his back as he cries silently.

 

Eventually, Goro sleeps, and Akira moves him to the futon as gently as he can, evidently he wasn’t quite gentle enough, because bleary eyes look up at him, he rests his hand on his hair, stroking gently until Akechi closes his eyes again, right before he falls back asleep Goro murmurs, 

 

“Thank you, Akira”

 

* * *

 


	3. A place to call home

Goro feels a distinct sense of disappointment when he wakes up in his apartment alone, a feeling that is immediately quashed because it’s  _ pathetic _ . There’s almost no sign that Kurusu was even there in the first place, besides a water bottle beside his bed and a sticky note on the fridge, he takes a sip of the water bottle, a mistake, as he almost chokes reading the note.

 

_ Sorry I couldn’t stay until you woke up, _

_ I had to run to catch the last train home _

_ There’s some soup in the microwave ready to eat! _

_ I’ll be back the day after tomorrow,   _

_ take care of yourself while I’m gone Akechi. _

 

There are cartoonish hearts and smileys drawn on the note that absolutely did  _ not _ make Goro blush. Why the  _ hell _ did Kurusu leave a note like this. There was no reason for him to do so, he could have just left, Goro didn’t expect him to be there when he woke in the first place. He holds his hand up to cover his mouth and his absolutely-not-blushing cheeks while coughing.

 

His train of thought is interrupted by his stomach growling. Goro looks back at the note, soup huh? then, having Kurusu over wasn’t completely pointless after all.

 

He checks the microwave before turning it on, slowly the smell of soup spreads through the apartment, the scent familiar from only hours ago, making him remember things that he’d much rather  _ forget _ . The feeling of Kurusu’s arms around him, the scent of his shirt against Goro’s tear covered face, the sound of his name, “ _ Akira, _ ” on his lips. 

 

Goro hates him, Goro fucking  _ hates _ him. He hates what Kurusu does to him, to his walls. His face burns from embarrassment of showing something so vulnerable, so pathetic, to Kurusu, his enemy, the boy he’s going to kill. 

 

He doesn’t feel hungry anymore.

 

__________

 

Akira calls the thieves to meet the morning after visiting Akechi’s apartment. Everyone arrives a while after lunch time, as per usual. He fills them in on what happened, or at least some of what happened. He avoided mentioning the nightmare and subsequent comforting, it felt to private to expose, something to stay in his memory, not to be released into the open air for all to hear. He almost laughs at himself because of the irony.

 

“So, maybe the location has something to do with his apartment?” Ann says, after Akira finishes. 

 

“You’re probably right lady Ann!” Morgana says, tail flicking back and forth. Akira takes out his phone and rests it on the table, almost routine by now. The Meta-Nav’s red glows.

 

“Sunset Apartments” Ann says, clear and loud for the app to pick up.

 

“No candidates found” the team collectively groans.

 

Makoto speaks up then, “maybe we’re being to vague? Perhaps it’s just  _ his _ apartment that’s distorted in his mind,”

 

“You could be on to something there miss president” Ryuji yells, before shrinking sheepishly at the volume and rubbing the back of his head. 

 

“You said one of the numbers was incorrectly centered yes?” Akira can’t help but chuckle at the fact Yusuke remembered the aesthetics of the door he mentioned only offhandedly. “Then perhaps, ‘sunset apartments, room six-six-nine?’” the Nav responds with a negative once again.

 

Akira’s face must have changed, because the moment he thinks he’s figured it out Ryuji stops whispering ‘ayyy’ and questions him, “Think you got it, bro?” Akira nods.

 

“Sunset apartments, room six-six-six” it would explain the weirdly positioned nine, at the very least.

 

“Location Found”

 

“Hell yeah!” Ryuji holds his hand up for a high-five, Akira grins and returns the gesture, “one down, nice leader,” he finds himself glowing at the praise.

 

“That’s quite a foreboding apartment number, it almost feels like fate” Yusuke mutters to himself, his comment just barely reaching Akira’s ears.

 

“Now what about the distortion?” Makoto, ever the realist, decides to interrupt their mini celebration. Ryuji and Ann groan, Akira sympathizes, the thought of sitting in the attic for hours again, mindlessly listing words for the app to pick up on, sounds like torture. 

 

Nobody wants to start the endless rally, so the attic falls into silence. Ann looks like she wants to stand up and stretch, but Yusuke is watching her and sketching quickly, so she stills. 

 

Futaba breaks the silence hesitantly, speaking to the group for the first time today, “Hey, what about… childhood home?” She sounds wary, like she expects them to get mad at her.

 

“Distortion found” The Meta-Nav responds in the same voice as always. Akira and the other thieves’ gazes to turn towards Futaba, surprised. She panics from their intense focus and buries her head in her arms to hide, probably wishing she had one of her masks.

 

“Don’t look at me! I was just thinking about what could be important to him. He’s an orphan after all, we-” she cuts herself off, before continuing. “ _ They _ tend to hold the home they lived in with their parents pretty highly.” She looks off to the side, Akira doesn’t comment on the slip.   
  


“So, should we try infiltration today?” Morgana says. He looks excited at the prospect, a true thief.

 

“We did finish finding the keywords faster than I expected, We have plenty of time to go in today,” Makoto says, surprising Akira, she looks determined. He can’t help but wonder what changed her mind so drastically in just a few days. He knows when to let sleeping dogs lie, however.

 

__________

 

Arriving at Akechi’s apartment complex without his knowledge and with the thieves at his back feels odd, Akira feels like he’s breaking some unspoken trust. A wave of wrong with every step taken. He steels himself against the feeling, he has to do this. He can’t let everything happen over again. And so, with the memory of bulkhead doors slamming shut echoing in his ears. He activates the app. The world swims around them for only a moment, leaving the team disoriented. 

 

The apartment building looks almost the same, But out of the corner of his eye, Akira can see the shadows cling to his heels, urging him to look behind him. He resists.

 

None of the thieves want to risk taking the elevator, the idea of being trapped making all of them uncomfortable, though, they almost change their mind when they see the stairwell. The lights flicker overhead and Akira’s eyes play tricks in the dark.

 

Reaching the top of the sixth floor stairwell leaves him with immense relief for only a second, before he truly  _ sees _ it. He sees the carpet, Once stained with mysterious stains and pulling up at the edges, now there are puddles of liquid pooling, patches missing from unnamed claws. Akira feels a shiver go up his spine as he takes a step forward. Sounds that could be mistaken as whispers dance through his ears, louder with each step forward. He can’t see more than a few feet ahead of him, like the world beyond the darkness doesn’t exist. Nobody speaks, fearing what might be looking for them in the dark.

 

Finally they reach the door. An oasis of normalcy, The light finally behaves as it should, despite this, Akira feels hesitant to open the door, the tarnished brass of the handle taunting him.

 

Skull’s voice rings out through the oppressive silence, “What were you worried about Joker? This place looks completely normal!” his voice sounds tight around the joke, like he’s fighting against a knot in his throat. 

 

Skull opens the apartment door with more force than necessary, Akira doesn’t blame him, getting out of this hallway as soon as possible sounds like a good idea, despite not knowing what lies beyond the door. The blond speeds through the doorway, almost running, the other thieves quick on his heels before stopping in confusion.

 

Panther is the first to speak up, her voice only just louder than a whisper, “Hey uh, is it just me or is this place nothing like an apartment?” 

 

“It’s not just you Panther, I’m very confused myself.” Queen is quick to follow up on her statement, adjusting her mask in preparation for an unseen ambush in an unfamiliar area.

 

In front of them is a room that looks nothing like the apartment Akira visited yesterday, it looks like the front room to a house in a catalogue, nothing out of place and everything impeccably designed. A sense of uneasiness sweeps through the team, the house feels like no one lives there, like everything in it is just for show. There’s water running in the room over, Joker leads the way to investigate it. 

 

“Any enemies Oracle?” Mona asks the flying saucer floating in the air behind them, the green runes out of place in the well lit room.

 

“Not that I can read, shadow activity is unusually quiet” if Akira had more time, he would wonder how they could hear her so well, but as it is, he holds up his hand to silence them, peeking through the threshold connecting this room to the next.

 

Akechi Goro is standing in another too perfect to be real room, he’s much smaller than they remember him, and though they can’t see his face, his hair gives them all they need to identify him. He’s wearing an outfit that reminds Joker of his detective attire, stiff and tailored to look good on him.  Akechi’s sleeves are pushed up sloppily as he washes dishes, there’s a bruise on his forearm that wouldn't be visible if not for the pushed up sleeve.

 

Upon closer inspection, the room has a small mess that feels out of place in the form of dishes on the counters and a puddle on the floor. The child in front of them steps down from the stool he was using to reach the sink, his foot landing in a puddle of soapy water. Joker’s mind moves in slow motion as he sees the boy’s foot touch the ground and loose traction, he tries to reach out but his body feels heavy, like it’s been filled with glue. Akechi falls hard, his head hitting the floor as a plate shatters next to him, shards of glass flying. All of the thieves are unmoving, all too startled to take action.

 

Suddenly the boy scrambles to his knees and starts picking up the shards, his hands tinting with red as the glass cuts him. Pounding footsteps race down the stairs and a woman appears, yelling at Akechi until her face turns red.

 

“You worthless child! This is the third plate you’ve broken and this kitchen is a mess!”

 

Goro doesn’t meet her eyes, just keeps picking up the glass at an even more fevered rate. Akira has never seen him look so defeated and scared before. Small droplets of blood fall onto the wooden floors, this seems to anger the woman even more and she suddenly moves, pressing pristine boots onto glass covered hands, grinding them into the floor.

 

“Look at me when I’M TALKING TO YOU”

 

Akechi whimpers in pain and struggles weakly but keeps his head down, the woman spits in disgust and steps away. Goro stays where he is, his, small, so small, hands bleeding worse than before.

 

“Clean up this mess! If it’s not clean when I get back i’m taking you back to the orphanage”

 

At this, Akechi looks up, Joker inhales sharply at bright yellow eyes.

 

“Please! Anything but that! I’ll clean it I Pro-”

 

The woman is turning away and for the first time she and the boy see the thieves. The moment she notices them, Joker feels like he can move again, whatever effect the palace had on his body lifted. She looks startled but before she can say anything Skull is stepping forward.

 

“Look here lady! You can’t just do that to your kid!” his face is pale but his eyes are hardened with anger, he looks ready to fight. The woman laughs.

 

“Really and who’s going to stop me? You?” Akira watches her skin turn clear, her eyes melt off her face, Skull’s mouth falls open in horror as the woman becomes a glass-like mannequin, they all get into position to fight, Fox, Queen and Oracle backing up the team from the rear.

 

_______________

 

Their attacks aren’t working at all against her. Their weapons glance against her skin and their persona’s attacks do nothing, her crystalline skin remains un-marred. The team is covered in small gashes from her needle-like projectiles, the battle is decided when a stray needle hits Fox in the side of his neck, he instantly pulls his hand up to stop the bleeding, but red makes its way down and into his white collar anyway.

 

“I can’t reach him with my spells! We need to get out of here fast so I can heal him!’ Mona yells, and Joker spots the front door, perhaps if they leave through it, the shadow won't chase them.

 

“This way everyone!” Joker takes off towards the door while casting a physical barrier for his allies to get away behind. He slams open the door and the team tumbles out of it, Fox looking light-headed and the rest of the team scared.

 

Mona quickly casts Diarama on Fox and the cut closes until only seamless skin and the left over blood can be seen. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief. Akira collapses against the far wall much like Ryuji and oracle. The rest just sit in the middle of the hall, to tired to move after the adrenaline has left them.

 

_______________

 

After what feels like forever, the team stands back up, they need to discuss what happened, but nobody wants to be the first to speak. Finally Ryuji breaks the silence with “okay so what the Fuck was that?!” 

 

Akira sighs at his boyfriend’s words, reaching over to pat his arm, attempting to calm him down, he knows that was tough on Ryuji. Being unable to move when something terrible was happening, even if it’s to someone you don’t exactly like, is hard.

 

Fox attempts to answer Skull’s vulgar question, “I think that the child we saw was Akechi’s shadow, but I’m quite confused myself about how little power he seems to have, isn’t he supposed to be the ‘ruler’ of this palace?” 

 

Ann interjects, “What about that awful lady? Was she someone he actually knew?” she brings up a startling point, Akira doesn’t want to address this just yet, just thinking about it makes him sick to the stomach, but, he does need to say  _ something _ , to reassure his team.

 

“I think that’s the point of all this, Akechi’s shadow doesn’t have power here because that’s how he sees himself,” he leaves Panther’s question untouched, the palace will answer that soon enough, he feels.

 

“He’s one of the strongest of us though, dunno what he’d feel powerless ‘bout” skull mumbles.

 

“What about those injuries? It seems unlikely that people wouldn’t have noticed the scars such injuries would cau-” Makoto cuts herself off, her eyes widening, “the gloves!” she sounds like she’s just solved a difficult puzzle.

 

“The gloves?”

 

“Yes Ryuji! The gloves! He doesn’t take them off! I thought it was suspicious, but if he had scaring he didn't want people to see, it would make sense that he never takes off his gloves,”

 

“Didn’t he just wear them for the detective look?”  Futaba says, looking quizzical 

 

From there they talk some more about strategy and what to do, nothing concrete is laid out, due to how little they know about this place, but they all agree that avoiding getting into fights with the shadows is probably the best course of action. The decision is made while the team not so subtly watches Yusuke as his skin begins to regain color.

 

Everyone looks a bit more optimistic as Panther steps up to the door, they’re determined to finish this palace and now that they have a plan, they can start taking steps toward that goal.

 

None of the thieves notice the bright yellow eyes watching them from the darkness, disappearing as the door opens.

____

 

Where is it? Goro’s been looking for what seems like hours. He’s so tired, there’s sweat dripping down his face, his heavy coat and gloves only amplifying the heat. Despite the warped cognition around him he’s still in his detective attire. He really needs to rethink this outfit, any amount of strenuous movement leaves him out of breath from the heat. 

 

He hears guards behind him and dives into a nearby closet. He’s running out of time, he can’t keep wandering around without a plan, he’ll get caught sooner or later. God he can’t do this much longer, he feels drained, is this supposed to happen? He can’t remember. 

 

Where is shido? Goro needs to find him before… something. He can't remember, Goro clutches his hands to his head in pain when he tries to remember.

 

A flash of black and a glint shine in the side of Goro’s eye his arm lifts and fires his gun at the figure before he could think. Panic seizing him at the thought of being found by shadows while he so  _ tired.  _ The sound of stuttered footsteps brings Goro back from his thoughts, he looks up to where he heard the noise. A figure in a black waistcoat and a white mask stands a distance away, they must have just come around the corner, Goro looks harder through hazy eyes, Joker? What is Joker doing in shido’s palace? Joker reaches down and shakily presses a hand to his side, it comes back red and he stumbles, Goro rushing to catch him. 

 

“Joker! what are you doing here!?” 

 

Joker trembles in Goro’s arms, he looks up at Goro and his mask is gone, leaving Goro with nothing to do but look into gunmetal toned eyes. Akira reaches up and puts his hand on Goro’s cheek, blood starting to rush down his forehead, Akira doesn’t seem to notice, keeping his eyes on Akechi.

 

“Isn’t this what you planned Akechi?”

 

______________________

 

Goro wakes up screaming and scrambling for something, anything, to calm him down, to confirm that it was just a dream. His hand lands on his phone.

 

It still has service, he allows himself to relax minimally.

 

The room is empty and Goro can’t see his clock because of the fever haze and darkness obscuring the room. He shakily gets out of bed and rushes to the bathroom, retching noises fill the apartment for what feels like an eternity. Finally, Goro stands up and splashes his face at the sink. 

 

His clothes feel suffocating, each seem ripping and tearing at his skin, he rips them off before falling into his now chilled sheets. He wants to text Akira, to make sure he’s okay. Instead, he curls up under the sheets feeling exposed. His head is pounding.


	4. Don’t Leave Me Here Alone

Watching Panther open the door, watching her eyes widen in shock, leaves Ryuji prepared to see something unexpected. What could be behind the door that they haven’t already seen, that would startle her like that? Once he’s beyond the door himself, he understands. There stands an apartment nothing like the house this same door showed them a few minutes before.

 

Beer cans and trash obscure the floor. The smell that greets him is awful, alcohol and human sweat permeate the room. Ryuji shudders at the familiarity, but before he can say anything Joker gestures for the thieves to stay silent. There are no sounds in the apartment apart from the snoring coming from the man sleeping on a stained couch, only a few meters from the door.

 

Joker creeps along, staying close to the walls, where the trash is less frequent. He leads the team out of the main room and into a side hallway, away from what Ryuji assumes to be a shadow, since there’s nothing else it _could_ be, really. They avoid the master bedroom, since there doesn’t seem to be much in there but trash. Joker stops in front of a door that looks locked from the outside.

 

As Joker bends over to pick the lock, Queen keeps watch on the shadow in the other room, ready to warn them if it wakes up. Leaving Ryuji ‘n the rest with not much else to do but wait.

 

Joker looks like he’s having trouble with the lock, his hands fumbling on the pick. Mona beats him to comforting him with a tap on his leg, giving Joker a thumbs up when he looks. That seems to do the trick, as much as Ryuji is begrudged to admit,  ‘cause Joker pulls in a deep breath and smiles at Mona. Ryuji watches him release the breath and nod, his hands steadier than before.

 

The lock snaps open with a click, making Ryuji tense, waiting for any other noise, there are none, leaving nothing to do next but open the door and see what else this palace has in store for them.

 

Inside the small room is a child’s cot, too small even for the one occupying it. A now familiar brown haired child lays curled up, sleeping. He has a bruise on his cheek that’s scabbed on some parts, like he was it with something so hard his skin broke. His hair looks messy and tangled. Ryuji’s heart aches with sympathy at the sight.

 

They search the room while Queen keeps watch, the kid doesn’t seem to be waking up anytime soon, but Ryuji tries his best to be quiet. He quickly discovers that the room is practically empty, nothing else but a duffle bag and the bed in the corner.

 

Mona checks the duffle bag with barely concealed glee and Ryuji can’t help but feel bad. The kid doesn’t have much, he shouldn’t have to deal with strangers going through his stuff while he sleeps, much less a treasure lusting cat.

 

Mona’s eyes get that creepy glint in them as he holds up a… Featherman figure? Ryuji doesn’t know much about Featherman, but he thinks this one was called Owl, the yellow outfit vaguely familiar.

 

Whatever it is, it doesn’t look like the treasures he’s seen. It’s too solid, too real.

 

Mona gets Joker’s attention and waves them back to the door. Joker seems to consider it, looking around, before nodding and holding his hand up for everyone to follow.

 

Leaving the apartment is just as nerve wracking, every step feels like he’s on a minefield, when the door’s in sight he can’t help but relax a little, that’s when he hears it, the crunching of a half full bag of chips being stepped on. Ryuji franticly looks at his own feet to see if they were the source of the noise, but to his luck it wasn’t him this time.

 

He looks at the shadow in the couch, adrenaline high, only for his eyes to widen in horror at the sight of it sitting up

 

“Guys! We need to get out of here _right_ now” Ryuji yells, surely startling some of his teammates. It gets them moving though, and soon Joker is slamming open the door.

 

* * *

 

 

Futaba’s the last one to get out of the room, Necronomicon doesn’t do well with doors and her control isn’t too great right now. Her hands are shaking, they have been since she saw the lock on the outside of Akechi’s room door.

 

She’s trying _really_ hard to keep breathing deeply, like Ann taught her to. Well, at least the others can’t see her from inside her persona, she’s a few moments from crying and if anyone asks her if she’s okay she knows it would break the dam.

 

Everyone’s talking and Futaba knows she needs to join them, a navigator without information can only lead the team astray afterall. She takes a final, stabilizing breath and lets her persona dissolve.

 

Queen is the first to great her, “Ah Oracle, thank you for joining us, I don’t know how much you can hear inside Necronomicon, but we were discussing the door”

 

She settles on a not quite lie, “I can usually hear just fine but there was some interference today, fill me in?”

 

“We think the term ‘childhood home’ might have meant something different than we first thought”

 

“Like, ‘homes’ instead of ‘home’?”

 

“Exactly, you catch on fast!” Mona praises

 

“Speaking of the door, mona, why did you grab that figure?”

 

“It’s the treasure” he pauses, inspecting the figure in his hands, when he speaks next he sounds a lot more hesitant “I.. Think”

 

Upon seeing the figure Futaba can’t control her excitement, “Is that Yellow Owl from Featherman R?” she grabs the figure from Mona.

 

“Ah right, i seem to remember you like Featherman Oracle” Inari says, and Futaba can’t help but scowl at him in memory of what he did to her precious team and the pose she worked so hard on, holding the figure to her chest protectively.

 

* * *

 

 

Akira watches as his team interacts playfully with one another, despite the eerie atmosphere of the hallway they sit in.

 

“I thought I heard some idiots making a ruckus,” a condescending voice breaks the team out of their conversation. Akira can’t help but flinch, the tone just a bit too familiar and suddenly he can hear engines again. He doesn’t have time to dwell though, because soon he’s twisting around and pulling out his dagger, ready to protect the team.

 

“This isn’t inside of the room, how is he here?” Oracle’s distressed voice calls out from behind him, causing the dark figure to laugh. He steps into the light where they can see him and Akira almost takes a step back. The boy in front of him looks so familiar it _hurts_. Akechi Goro stands in front of him, in an outfit that reminds Akira of his Loki attire, dark threads and more belts than reasonable.

 

Dark horns draped with thin red chains connect to a mask that does little to hide golden eyes or the smirk that seems more like a placeholder than a real expression.

 

Shadow Akechi leans against the wall casually, broken manacles hang from his wrists, leaving Akira to wonder what was keeping him chained.

 

The shadow doesn’t seem to be in the mood to attack right now, so Akira allows himself to relax minimally.

 

His mouth feels like it’s full of metal shavings, but he brings himself to speak nonetheless, “What do you want, Akechi”

 

He should have just kept his mouth shut, for all of the attention the shadow gives his question, “He doesn’t deserve to be saved you know,” arguable at best, Akira’s going to save him anyway.

 

Skull voices his thoughts almost perfectly, “That’s bullshit! Everyone deserves a chance to be better, even bratty detective princes,” the shadow looks surprised at his words, smirk disappearing only for a moment, before it’s back in place, wider than before, his too-sharp teeth send shivers down Akira’s spine. Their eyes meet and Akira’s breath catches in his throat.

 

“I wonder… if you would change your mind, once you’ve seen what he’s done” Akechi is talking to Skull, but his eyes haven’t strayed from Akira’s.

 

None of the thieves know how to react, Akira looks at his team to see various shades of confusion, he tries his best to play along. Shadow Akechi’s gaze feels tangible, he really doesn’t want the shadow to catch wind that he knows more than he should.

 

“Nevertheless,” Akechi pauses, reaching up and adjusting his mask, causing the teens to tense, “I can’t let you change his heart. There’s simply too much work that still isn’t finished,” his smirk extends farther, consuming his face and finally reaching his eyes. He lets out a chilling chuckle.

 

Akechi snaps his fingers, three dogs covered in thorns and blood appear behind him. Quietly, Akira is glad the shadow didn’t decide to attack them directly.

 

“Until we meet again Joker. If you survive” Akechi says before backing into the darkness, his golden eyes the last thing Akira sees before he fades into the halls surrounding them, laughter echoing off of unseen walls.

 

The dogs snarl and snap at them, slowly stalking and spreading out, their eyes, _too many_ of them, honed without faltering, making to surround them, their thorned sides heaving as they growl.

 

“Uh-oh, these shadows are strong. I’m not sure we can beat them Joker” Oracle’s voice calls out. At some point during the encounter with Shadow Akechi, she’d resummoned necronomicon then, her voice ringing in his ears slightly disorientingly.  

 

“Perhaps we should retreat?” Akira nods at Queen’s suggestion, holding up his hand in signal to the team to prepare for retreat. He’s glad they planned out nonverbal signals this time around, he can’t begin to count the number of times shadows had heard their planning and countered them before they could move.

 

Now they just have to wait for the perfect moment to get away

 

* * *

 

The run through dark hallways seems never ending, the dogs always close on their heels. For a moment, Akira fears that they’ll follow them out of the metaverse and

 

Under the bright and harsh summer light Akira, from his position with his elbows on his knees, can see that the team is more than a bit worse for the wear. An assortment of scrapes and bruises on those who fought, exhaustion all around.

 

He himself is panting harshly, maybe he should meet up with Ryuji to work out more often, his boyfriend would surely enjoy that. Akechi’s words bounce in his head, If they survive this palace, he’ll ask.

 

Akira manages to get the team to agree to take a break for a few days, not that it was too much of a fight since everyone was tired, some time off to enjoy the last bit of summer vacation was sorely appreciated.

 

The trip back to leblanc with Futaba and Morgana is quiet. All of them too exhausted to say much of anything. The lingering heat in the air makes him slump his shoulders and pluck at his collar for any relief he can find, however brief.

 

He can see the doubt in the way Futaba holds her shoulders, but leaves it be. She doesn’t look like she wants to talk to him about it, only that she’s thinking deeply about something. Akira can relate.

 

Morgana decides to go home with Futaba for the night, Akira doesn’t complain, a night to himself sounds like almost exactly what he needs right now. The weight of lying about how much he knows lays heavy on his shoulders. A break will be nice.

 

* * *

 

Akira sighs as he lowers himself in the warm herbal scented water, his aching bones finally relenting in their assault against his nerves. The bath is empty except for him, a blessing after a long day. He can feel his stress leaching into the water, like purging poisoned blood.

 

Despite himself, Akira is worried. Akechi swims through his thoughts despite his attempts to keep his mind clear.

 

His shadow doesn’t make any sense, Akira’s sure he saw the eyes of the child on the other side of the door, they were yellow as can be, but the shadow he met in the hall was nothing like the boy who seems to be cursed to live out his memories behind that door.

 

Something niggled at the back of his mind, they were too different, despite only seeing the child for a few minutes, he just couldn’t believe that they were somehow the same person. The memory of a figure with long horns and coated in stripes comes to mind, but he stops himself before the crazed laughter can start to ring in his ears.

 

Ha, Akira came to the bathhouse to relax but all he can think about is Akechi and his palace. The gods, if they exist, must be laughing at him.

 

* * *

 

“What can I do for you today guinea pig?” Tae’s voice greets him as Akira walks into her clinic, it’s early in the day, much earlier than he would see her if school was going on. He _really_ doesn’t want to do a clinical trial today, so Akira decides to get right to the point.

 

“I need some fever medicine”

 

Tae’s eyebrows shoot up before she grins at him mischievously, “oh-ho-ho, an actual medical concern this time? Well color me surprised guinea pig” Akira flushes at her teasing, he’s always caught off guard by Takemi’s casual air surrounding the medicine he buys for the thieves, he didn’t get the chance to let it sink in _last_ year.

 

He was able to help her faster this time, the fear of her medicine much less potent after a year of spending time with her.

 

“So, who’s it for?” Akira’s broken out of his thoughts by Tae, he makes a face at her “oh don’t look at me like that, I know it’s not for you,”

 

Tae looks a bit disapproving that he’s buying medicine for someone without bringing them in to see her and Akira’s struck with the memory that she used to be the kind of doctor that followed rules to a fault. He braces himself for her questioning, hoping that he can get this over with quickly.

 

He’ll admit, he’s worried about Akechi. Akira answers Tae’s questions mostly on auto-pilot, thinking back to his recent visit, the nightmare he bore witness to shook him up more than he’d like to admit.

 

The thought of Akechi crying on him clings to the forefront of his mind for the rest of his visit and follow him out of the clinic. If she can see that he’s not focused, she keeps it to herself, for which he is ever grateful.

 

* * *

  

An incessant knocking wakes Goro from fitful sleep. Wonderful, Kurusu’s here. Goro struggles to escape the blanket dungeon he’s created for himself to little avail. After one particularly flailing tug Goro find’s he’s run out of futon to struggle on and tumbles to the floor with a thud.

 

Well, at least he’s free.

 

The walk to the door is more difficult than he remembers, his legs shaking like a newborn fawn’s, much to his annoyance. He hesitates to open the door. Standing there in the entrance to his apartment in only his boxers causes him to pause, but, after checking the spyhole to confirm that it is, in fact, Kurusu, he grits his teeth and opens the door.

 

Kurusu is smiling at him and it makes Goro want to slam the door in his face. He has entirely too much energy to exist anywhere near him right now. But instead of closing the door and burying himself under his blankets once again he sighs and opens the door further, letting Kurusu into the room before diving back into the bed as he wanted. If he has see Kurusu right now he should at least be allowed warmth to deal with it.

 

Kurusu, despite only seeing him for a moment, decides to comment on his appearance “You look awful Akechi” his tone light and joking.

 

He manages to work his voice through the glass in his throat to say, “You don’t say? Maybe you should be the detective Kurusu” perhaps, it’s a bit harsh, but he’s _really_ not in the mood for his games today.

 

“Alright, alright point taken, I brought some meds for you, but you need to eat something first,” he can imagine Kurusu’s hands up in a mockery of surrender, but doesn’t pry open his eyes to check.

 

Goro groans at the thought of eating anything right now, Kurusu, having heard, has the audacity to chuckle. He hears the familiar sound of the microwave opening.

 

“Hey, isn’t this the same bowl I put in here yesterday?” oh, right, he forgot.

 

“It is”

 

“Is the soup not any good? I could have sworn it was fine” His voice sounds unsure, it’s unlike him, Goro would analyze that reaction, if thinking didn’t feel like hammering a spike into his temple.

 

“I’m sure the soup tastes just fine Kurusu” he decides uncover just his head, to watch Kurusu move through the kitchen doing... something. The light hurts his eyes.

 

Kurusu then opts for a scolding tone, “Goro you need to eat, you haven’t had anything to eat since the day before yesterday at leblanc”

 

The use of his first name causes Goro to flush, Kurusu doesn’t seem to have noticed his slip, He’s too busy looking at him with soft, concerned eyes that make Goro’s skin crawl.

 

Kurusu carries the bowl of soup to the table and Goro begrudgingly gets up to sit with him, holding the blanket around himself, feeling a bit exposed now that he’s not fresh from waking up.

 

There’s a napkin next to the soup and on it sits two pills, they’re white and nondescript, no brand names visible. Much like the shady supplies Kurusu brings into the metaverse for them. He has to fight down the panic in his throat, Kurusu wouldn’t poison him, not while he’s still useful. He swallows the pills.

 

“oh” Kurusu sounds surprised, “you were supposed to eat before you took them” he pauses, “sorry, i should have said that, it should be fine though,” perfect, Kurusu may not poison him but Goro may have just done the job himself. Eating should be a high priority then, despite the thought making his stomach rise to his throat.

 

The soup is… good. Better than he was expecting. After the first bite eating doesn’t seem like much of a chore. Soon, the emptiness he didn’t even notice in his stomach is gone. Kurusu looks pleased with himself and whether or not it’s a placebo, Goro _does_ feel better.

 

Once he’s finished with his soup he tries to stand, to bring the empty bowl to the sink, sick or not he needs to clean up, but he’s hit with a wave of dizziness and falls back into a sitting position.

 

Kurusu is on him in a moment “Akechi! Are you alright?” Goro nods, he is, “maybe you should just stay sitting, i’ll wash this,” he’s holding up the bowl and spoon while he walks to the sink. Looking at the light from the kitchen brings back the pain in his head.

 

Goro’s head feels like it’s full of cotton, he doesn’t want to move from the warm spot he’s created, maybe he could just lay his head in his arms and stay still. Forget about the stack of paperwork in his briefcase, forget the metaverse and shido and just, relax.

 

Unfortunately, Kurusu seems insistent on disturbing him, his deep voice stirring Goro from the pleasant fog he was lingering in. looking up at him with blurry eyes Goro can see that he’s speaking but for the life of him he can’t understand what’s being said, his voice nothing more than a dull droning bolstering the static in his ears.

 

Then, Kurusu’s hand settles on Goro’s hair, softly brushing it away from his face and Goro can’t help but lean into the touch. The warmth from the blanket and the gentle touch enough to make him let out a quiet noise of contentment and lay his head back on his arms. For the first time in a long while he feels safe, here in his apartment, with Akira by his side.

 

They sit there for what could be a few minutes or a few hours before Akira moves away and Goro immediately has to suppress a noise of displeasure, the lightness of his bones dissipating quickly, leaving him cold. Akira is talking again, it takes all of his focus to tune away the static

 

“-eed to go, the trains stop running soon” he must have made a noise, something that sounds affirmative, because Akira turns away.

 

He wants to stop him. He wants to tell him to stay. The words sit on his tongue, weighing it down. Akira looks back at him before he opens the door, checking on him, it would be so easy to ask him to stay. He misses his chance though, because Akira’s already turned away, clicking open the door.

 

Panic consumes him, he wants him to stay, _needs_ him to stay. Goro reaches up, his arm shaking with weakness and opens his mouth to say something, _anything_!

 

“ _Don’t go_ ” his voice is weak, quiet, little more than a breath of air.

 

The door clicks shut

 

* * *

 


	5. Where the heart is

Goro wakes up distinctly uncomfortable, there’s hair stuck to his face and his neck hurts from falling asleep curled up on the floor, which, go figure, isn’t good for his bones. But, he doesn’t feel sick anymore, he should thank Aki-, he should thank Kurusu.

 

His apartment is cold, causing goosebumps on his exposed skin, the blanket he had wrapped around himself… yesterday? He glances at the kitchen window, early morning light pours into his apartment, yesterday, then, had fallen off while he was sleeping.

 

Goro, despite his sore body, gets up to stretch, his skin feels oily and his hair is a mess. he needs a shower. Goro’s briefcase sits innocently on the table, his eyes widen. His _paperwork_. Thought of doing paperwork all day almost makes Goro lie back down to sleep the day away, consequences be damned. However, he’s the detective prince and his boss will only wait so long.

 

Alright. Shower first. then, when he’s done he’ll do his paperwork. But, he glances at his schedule on his phone, he _had_ planned to go rock climbing today, it would be a waste to let his reservation expire, after all, he’d already paid for it.

 

Inevitably, like the teenager he is, Goro ends up procrastinating.

 

* * *

 

“Come on you asshole stop stealing my fries” Ryuji laughs, smacking Akira’s hand, “you have your _own_ fries”

 

“But yours are better” Akira says with a deadpan, only just barely avoiding smiling.

 

“They’re the same fries and you know it”

 

Akira finds himself laughing, a grin on his face. It feels nice to relax. He hasn’t gotten to spend much time with Ryuji. He was so focused he didn’t notice he missed it.

 

“Thank you for spending the day with me”

 

Ryuji’s blush reaches his ears in record time “aw come on, don’t get sappy with me,” he scrubs the back of his neck with his hands, suddenly he looks up at Akira’s shit-eating grin, “I’m still not giving you my fries”

 

“Not even one?” Ryuji bursts into surprised laughter, the kind that makes you grin widely and hold your eyes shut. In that moment, Akira has to take a second to calm down from how _cute_ his boyfriend is.

 

“What’s that look on your face?” of course, Ryuji noticed

 

Akira opts for teasing him, schooling his face into neutrality, “What look?”

 

“For real?” Ryuji doesn’t look at all convinced, there’s a slight concern under his playful annoyance. Ah, Akira needs to get rid of that immediately.

 

“Just thinking about how cute you are” like a switch was flipped, Ryuji’s face floods with red. Akira can see his slight panic as he checks around them to see if anyone is listening in, he can also see the relief when he finds that nobody is paying them any mind.

 

“ ‘m not cute” oh, he’s pouting now. His arms are crossed over his chest in mock anger and his eyes steadfastly watch the tiled floor. Akira’s hand moves to his chest and he grips the front of his shirt, he can’t help but push a little further.

 

“You’re adorable,” he keeps his voice low, the fact that Ryuji hasn’t told him to stop yet, even though they’re in public is a blessing in and of itself. He doesn’t want to push his luck too far.

 

Ryuji buries his head in his arms on the table, despite his attempts to hide the red on his ears burns brightly, “ ‘m not”

 

“Enchanting”

 

“Bro” he’s whining, not really giving himself much of a chance on the _not_ cute side of things.

 

Akira lowers his head to get a view through the gap between Ryuji’s arms, he’s smiling, “Handsome”

 

“Now I know you’re just teasing me”

 

“That doesn’t make it any less true”

 

“Sounds fake man”

 

Akira looks around and covertly grabs Ryuji’s hand, he squeezes once before letting go, “We’ll just have to agree to disagree then,” then just to be contrary he grabs a fry and chews on it smugly.

 

“-Oi I _just_ told you. Eat your own fries!”

 

* * *

 

“Oh! I’ve been looking for this one since they released it” Ryuji lifts a comic off the shelve of a bookstore nestled in the shibuya underground mall, Akira discovered it on one of the nights he was wandering, avoiding sleep while his thoughts were stained with blood.

 

Under the lights of the store, Ryuji’s hair almost looks red, for a moment Akira can see his limbs twisted out of proportion, his blood pooling on the ground. Akira shakes his head, today is supposed to be fun.

 

“Let me buy it for you”

 

“For real?” Ryuji’s voice gets a bit louder as his excitement of the prospect shows. Akira nods at him and Ryuji happily passes him the book.

 

Ryuji walks next to Akira through the rest of the mall with a spring in his step. They don’t find anything else of interest, but Ryuji’s hand brushing against his as they walk is enough.

 

* * *

 

“Okay you’re totally cheating” Ryuji says, despite literally laying in Akira’s lap, giving him front row to how much Akira isn’t cheating right now.

 

“How could I be cheating Ryuji” Akira’s eyes don’t leave the screen, but he can imagine the disbelief on Ryuji’s face.

 

“I dunno! But you _have_ to be cheating, I’ve never seen anyone get that high of a score in this game” this statement is punctualized with Ryuji throwing his arms in the air, almost hitting Akira in the face.

 

“Have you ever even _seen_ anyone play this game?” Akira wasn’t going to tell him about the month he spent stuck without anything to do but play video games or let his thoughts stew, so deflection it is.

 

“That’s besides the point,” Ryuji dodges his reasoning like a water balloon in the winter, “anyway, i’m pretty sure you’re the only person on the planet that plays..” he looks at the box, “Punch Ouch. Seriously Akira, where do you even _get_ these”

 

“They sell them in the retro games store in akihabara”

 

“You went to _Akihabara,_ and you still have this old piece of junk?” Ryuji sounds distraught at the very concept.

 

“Not all of us care about how new the system is Ryuji” despite his harsh words Akira’s tone is light, playful.

 

“There are better games!” Ryuji waves the box in front of his face, if Akira didn’t know any better he’d think his boyfriend was _trying_ to mess him up, “actual games! Not rip-offs of real games”

 

“If this isn’t a real game then what am I playing?”

 

“The ghost of game’s past” Ryuji deadpan’s, causing Akira to snort, he reflexively reaches up to cover his mouth at the sound, but his hand slips from around the controller and it falls from his grip. Landing squarely on Ryuji’s face before tumbling to the floor. Landing gods-know-where, probably under the couch.

 

Ryuji springs up clutching at his nose and before Akira can move out of the way, their foreheads collide with a resounding crack. Ryuji tumbles off the couch, right on the controller’s heels. Akira groans in pain.

 

“Dude, how did that even happen” Ryuji says as he presses his hands on both his forehead and nose, “that shit’s straight out of a gag manga”

 

“I don’t _know_ , but they definitely didn't exaggerate the pain” Akira looks down at Ryuji, “is your nose okay?”

 

“It doesn’t feel broken” while he talks he squeezes the nose in question, his voice turning nasally, Akira’s shoulder’s shake with laughter, Ryuji looks up at him and with the fakest anger Akira’s ever heard, says “ey what’re you laughing at” Akira lets out a wheeze, pain forgotten. Ryuji can’t help but grin along.

 

“Your voi- OH FUCK” In a moment of miscalculation, Akira overbalances and slips off the couch, landing with a half hearted “ _oof._ ” peals of laughter fall from both of their lips as they lay on the attic floor like the two idiots in love they are.

 

* * *

 

_Hey, since it’s the last day of summer and all, why don’t we meet up!_

 

_I see no reason to disagree, what did you have in mind Ann?_

 

_Welllll we did say we were gonna go to the beach (¬‿¬ )_

 

_I’m not very fond of that face hahaha…_

 

_Don’t worry about it Akechi_

 

_I should be free, I don’t have any shifts scheduled_

 

_Hell Yeah! If my bro’s free I can come too_

 

_I need to finish my paperwork before I can be sure if I can join you, is that alright?_

 

_Oh, are you okay now? Did the medicine work?_

 

_Haha, yes it did. I should thank you for that._

 

_I’m glad! Don’t work yourself too hard._

 

_I apologize for interrupting, but i’d like to confirm that I can also attend._

 

_Futaba, will you come with us?_

 

_Y-yeah, I think I can (o^ ^o)_

 

* * *

 

“Hey! You made it!” Sakamoto is the first to notice his approach, he’s a bit late after his fretting over what to wear. A quick look at the group in front of him shows him he shouldn’t have worried, he’s not the only one that’s wearing a jacket even though it’s a bit too warm to be practical.

 

He locks eyes with Kitagawa and a brief flash of understanding runs between them. He sends him a polite nod, which Goro finds himself returning.

 

“Yes, I hope you didn’t wait too long?”

 

“Nah, besides, we’re waiting for the girls to get out of the changing rooms,”

 

“I see,”

 

Conversation ceases for a while and Goro is left to fidget with his sleeves. His jacket is a bit too big for him, but it does serve it’s purpose well, the sleeves pass his fingertips easily, and despite looking like a child who stole his parents clothes, Goro likes it.

 

The others must see something behind him because they all stand to join him in the sun. Goro turns around to see entirely too much of Takamaki Ann and Niijima Makoto, he averts his eyes, cheeks flushed lightly in the summer sun.

 

“Woah y’all look great!” Sakamoto articulates eloquently. All jokes aside, Goro thought he would be more… Vulgar. Takamaki does a cheerful peace sign and throws her arm around his shoulder.

 

“C’mon is that _all_ you have to say? Cat got your tongue?”

 

Kitagawa is the next one to speak, “The flowers look nice on you Ann” Goro can’t help but feel a sense of unease, will he be expected to say something as well?

 

“The ruffles on your skirt suit you well Makoto” Kurusu notes. Alright it should be Goro’s turn, just say something polite, somethi-

 

He’s saved by the bell as Futaba steps into the sun wearing… a towel around her head?

 

“This is perfect!” her voice is muffled as she walks blindly forward. Why did she develop an impulse to cover her face? Goro isn’t sure he truly wants to know.

 

“There’s nothing perfect about that,” Niijima moves to free her from her self imposed bindings, “stay still for a second… There” Futaba’s long hair falls down her back as the towel is removed, it’s grown out quite a lot.

 

* * *

 

“I’m glad you came with us”

 

“It has been rather enjoyable,” Goro can’t think of a way to continue the conversation, leaving an awkward air hanging around them, tension just as tangible as the salt on the breeze.

 

“Akechi look I-”

 

“-Are you sure they won’t miss your presence?” Goro’s question brings Kurusu to a pause, startling him out of whatever he was going to say.

 

“I don’t think they will,” he pauses and the barest hint of a smirk crosses his face, “after all, they seemed pretty occupied with Yusuke’s new muses” Goro finds himself watching his face instead of the pool in front of them. Finding the micro expressions Kurusu gives off much more interesting than any sea life.

 

“If you’re sure” despite the words leaving Goro’s own mouth, he’s not sure what he said.

 

Kurusu looks up and meets Goro’s eyes, catching Goro’s staring, their eyes lock only for a moment before Goro is quickly turning his attention back to the fish, oh look, a crab. His cheeks are burning, hopefully his hair covers them.

 

The waves push and pull freely in the background.

 

“Akira,”

 

“What?”

 

“You should call me Akira,”

 

“...” Goro finds himself unable to think of anything to say. In his hesitation Akira’s face turns red and he waves his hands in panic.

 

“I mean! Only if you want to, you’re just the only one on the team who doesn’t use given names,”

 

Goro cuts off Kurusu’s rambling, “am I?”

 

“Are you what?”

 

“On the team. I assumed this was temporary” he can’t help but allow some vulnerability to slip into his voice, maybe it’s the sea, or the fact that they’re alone together, with only fish to bear witness to Goro’s mental flailings.

 

“I can’t speak for the others, but,” He pauses, searching for words, “I want you to join us, Goro” In this moment, Kurusu sounds so _real_ that Goro can’t help but believe him.

 

Being wanted, being _needed_ , it’s everything he’s ever wanted. A warm feeling spreads through his chest and just for a moment, he’s able to forget about shido, forget about his plan that would surely bring about the death of the boy beside him. He smiles gently “I would like that, Akira”

 

* * *

 

 

Niijima breaks the peaceful silence that had spread over the group of teenagers, “We should probably start heading home” Goro resents her just a bit for being the one to voice the news. He knew logically that all days had to came to a close eventually, but the relaxation has been nice. He doesn’t want it to end.

 

“Agreed, I’ll help pack up,” 

 

“As will I”

 

“Futaba seemed fine in the crowd too, so it looks like she’s overcome her last exercise” he’s not  sure why Takamaki insists on speaking as if Futaba isn’t only a handful of meters away. 

 

“Hey Futaba! We’re goin’ home. Stop standin’ around and help us!” Sakamoto yells. When she doesn’t reply, Akira walks over to her to investigate, followed by the rest of the others.

 

She doesn’t turn around to meet their eyes, “You know…”  Goro can barely hear her over the sound of the waves.

 

“All this time, I thought that it was my fault that my mom died,” no, no, no,  _ NO,  _ It was one thing to hear it in her palace from her shadow. It’s another thing entirely to hear it from her mouth directly.

 

“uh-huh” Goro can’t hear Sakamoto’s reply over the sudden static in his ears, is it just him or did the waves get louder.

 

“It’s because everyone said that I killed her. Everyone looked at me thinking I was a murderer” No, they couldn’t have. Goro’s the one that killed her. Why would they blame her daughter? She didn’t do anything wrong. He suddenly feels sick, he needs to leave. Now.

 

But he can’t, if he leaves they’ll  _ know _ . He can’t  _ move. He can’t breath.   _

 

_ “ _ It was cognitive psience, wasn’t it” Niijima’s words break Goro out of his thoughts.

 

“The cognitive world can become distorted through desires” A clean lab with bright lights.

 

_ “Are you ready Goro?” _

  
“If it becomes distorted, a person begins exhibiting problematic behavior in reality” he can’t listen to this, not now, maybe not ever. He needs to  _ leave _ .


	6. Duality of Man (and Shadow)

“And so we find ourselves here again” The door truly does hold a quiet air of foreboding, he would love to be able to capture it in a painting. Alas there’s never the time to attempt to do so.

 

“Yeah, i’m not sure I want to be here though, this hallway gives me the creeps” Panther’s arms are wrapped around her torso to ward off any wayward spiderwebs or bugs, despite the lack of bugs well, anywhere.

 

“We won’t need to be here long, Mona did the figure reappear?” Joker is quick to bring the team on task, his demeanor immediately switching to that of the phantom thief leader.

 

“Yeah Joker! Just as I said it would” Mona holds up the figure in question, a smug look adorning his face, like a cat that had just received cream.

 

Watching each of the team members turns out to be useful as his eyes turn to Oracle, “Oracle, are you alright? Your skin is quite pale”

 

“Only you would notice that Fox” comes Skull’s rude comment.

 

“It’s just… I can’t stop thinking about that kid”

 

“The shadow?”

 

“Yeah! But not the older one, I mean I have been thinking about him too but it’s mostly just the kid. It’s really weird how they look so different even though they both scan as his shadow, but that wasn’t what I was thinking about either” she cuts herself off and takes a deep breath, “he just… looks familiar, I don’t know” 

 

“It is a version of crow so i’m not surprised he would look familiar,” Queen, ever rational, brings common sense to the table.

 

“Not like that! Like, someone I knew  _ before _ . I just can’t put my finger on who”

 

Panther rests her hand on Oracle’s shoulder, soothing, “Maybe it’ll come to you while we look around?” 

 

“Yeah maybe…”

 

* * *

 

“Good evening trickster, congratulations are in order, you’ve once again changed the events of your world. Your bonds are growing stronger with each passing day as well” Akira’s still not used to the reedy voice of Igor, the real Igor. His voice grates on his ears just the slightest bit but, a mild headache is nothing compared to watching his personas morph into his shape only to be slaughtered.

 

“Are things really changing? I feel like with everything that changes, more things stay the same,”

 

Igor is quick to… reassure him? “Do not waver trickster, even though you are on the path to avoid ruin now, the false god is surely making a plan to throw you off course”

 

“Is he really still alive?” Akira mutters, his voice too low for the others in the room to pick up. Something doesn’t feel right about Yadabaoth’s disappearance. 

 

“Is something the matter trickster?” Lavenza gentle voice bridges the gap between reality and his mind, pulling him back.

 

“I can’t shake the feeling that something important has changed” a small child with yellow eyes, Goro quickly joining the team at the mention of Futaba, a chained monster.

 

“Many things  _ have _ changed, you being able to speak to myself and my master is proof of that”

 

“You’re right lavenza, must just be the stress getting to me, was there anything else you needed?”

 

* * *

 

When she finally gets through the door, Futaba can’t help but gasp. She knows the layout of this room.

 

“Guys” despite her attempts, she can’t keep her voice steady. Breath in, breath out, breath in-

 

“Oracle? What’s the matter?” Joker is the first to turn around and look at her, she can see the concern in his eyes. Having the reassurance that he’s there, that he’s  _ real, _ helps her calm down.

 

“This is my mom’s lab” just like that, everyone turns to look at her. She’s never been more grateful that necronomicon requires her to physically be inside of it to work.

 

Yusuke recovers from his shock the quickest, “Are you certain?”

 

“Yeah, i’d never forget it, even though I was only here a few times my mom always talked about it” sometimes she heard more about the lab and her experiments then she was supposed to, but they don’t need to know that right now.

 

“Why would your mom’s lab show up in Akechi’s palace though?” Futaba pauses, why would it? She doesn’t get much time to think before a bald guy walks into the lab, his eyes skating over and missing them completely. Instead, his eyes land on a boy sitting on the exam table.

 

Short, cropped brown hair frames his young face in a way that make Futaba’s head hurt, she knows the memory is  _ right  _ there but it’s just out of her grasp. That is, until she see the shirt he’s wearing, a Featherman R shirt that she and she mom hand picked for his birthday. Her voice cracks around a broken word, a nickname, “ _ Ace” _

 

* * *

 

Akechi Goro was young when his mother died, too young, he barely remembers her, the things he does remember are small, eating pancakes with her on sunday mornings,  Her hair was long and beautiful, it felt like silk in his hands when he brushed through it each night. He remembered the quiet of the house when she would leave for work each day.

  
The police found him brushing the hair of her corpse on the day he was left alone. Tear tracks long dried, his eyes just as dead as hers.

 

The orphanage was hell, he lived there completely alone, despite the children surrounding him. For months he was lost, spending everyday calling out for his mother, not understanding why she left him alone, how she could do this to him. Eventually, he realized that she didn’t leave him. Someone  _ took  _ her from him. Evidence came from phone calls made in quiet, scared tones, from pounding on their door in the middle of the night, Goro being shoved in the closet with frantic whispered words, “ _ stay quiet baby, everything will be okay,”  _ being left there for so long he fell asleep curled up, alone in the dark. 

 

Someone was  _ hurting _ her and Goro would find out who, he would make them  _ pay. _ That thought kept him from rotting in the years he was tossed from house to house, told he was useless, a burden, a bastard son, it was a grim motivator in Goro’s darkest hours. He studied and researched, a plan slowly, ever so slowly forming in his mind.

 

Then, one day, a woman came to the orphanage, she said she wanted to meet him. She was interested in him, she wanted to _adopt_ him, not just foster him, like the other houses he was sent to. She introduced herself as Isshiki Wakaba, she was a researcher.

 

Suddenly, he was brought to a place where he was wanted. Where he was  _ safe _ . It was hard to believe at first, he couldn’t accept that she wanted him in her family, no strings attached, especially since she already had a daughter. Eventually he relaxed, in his relaxation, he found his half-formed plan drifting from his mind. 

 

He became close with Futaba through late nights spent together watching Featherman, expressing their love for the show’s heros together. Through their love of Wakaba. They learned together, he would bring home his worksheets from school and they would puzzle them out, she was so  _ smart _ that most days he forgot their gap in age. It was… Nice. He was safe, healing.

 

He never figured out why Wakaba adopted him in the first place, but that was okay, he had a  _ home _ now.

 

* * *

 

On a normal Wednesday after school he found himself alone in his bedroom.  _ His bedroom _ even after months the concept still baffled him. He was doing his homework when the world started to swim with dark reds around him. Standing up in fright left him dizzy and when he opened his eyes, he found himself not in his room, but in a horrifying landscape surrounded by darkness.

 

Monsters roamed through endless train tracks, he tried to hide, but they found him eventually. Their swings at him hurt, they  _ hurt so bad _ . He wanted it to stop, he couldn’t stand the pain anymore. Just before a final blow could land, Goro heard a voice.

 

_ Are you truly ready to give up? _

_ What about your goal? _

 

His goal? Goro’s memories came rushing back. His mother, bruises on her wrists and neck. His promise to avenge her. He had given up on her. His time with the Isshiki’s had made him complacent, made him forget that he’s broken, useless. He forgot his goal and now that he remembers he’s going to die, too weak to accomplish anything. Just as he comes to this conclusion, the voice rings out again.

 

_ I will be your power, call my name, and your goal will become attainable  _   


He doesn’t need any time to decide, he would give anything to get revenge for his mother. A sharp pain races through his head and in that moment the only thing he can think is that he’s  _ dying _ , something forms on his face. It feels  _ wrong _ , like a thousand bugs crawling on his skin. He reaches up and  _ pulls _ , feeling pain but also relief. He doesn’t notice the flames until he opens his eyes, a name that’s entirely new but also familiar on his lips.  _ “Vidar”  _

 

A rush of power and fire fills his veins, the monsters hurting him don’t stand a chance. Now, he can get his revenge, as well as keep his new family  _ safe. _

 

* * *

 

He doesn’t remember how he got out of that awful place. Everything a blur of color and aching bones. 

 

There’s bruises and cuts all over his body when Wakaba gets home. She’s horrified and when she asks what happened, against everything he’s learned, he tells her.    
  


Surprisingly, she believes him, she doesn’t tell Goro it was just a dream, or accuse him of lying. She tells him about her research, about the cognitive world, wakaba holds his face in her hands when she asks him if he wants to help her understand this new world. Refusing was never truly an option. He would do anything for her.

 

Ultimately, that was his undoing.

 

* * *

 

Akira watches in horror as Masayoshi Shido walks into the lab, he looks remarkably similar to how he did the last time Akira saw him on tv, right down to the untrustworthy look on his face. He doesn’t notice them as he walks towards the boy sitting on the exam table like one might approach a cornered animal, slowly, with purpose.

 

This time the boy is wearing fitting clothes and there are no bruises to be seen, he looks healthy despite is obvious nervousness at an adult he doesn’t know approaching him. 

 

In that moment, Akira can truly see how small the shadow is, with his scared yellow eyes. He can’t be older than eight can he? He’s just so frail, in runs through his mind that there’s irony in thinking of  _ Goro _ like this. The boy that, in another timeline, tried to kill him. A boy that  _ Has _ killed people in this timeline.

 

“Who are you?” His distrust of Shido is apparent in his eyes and Akira tries to not let the sick satisfaction with that fact stick in the place it’s settling in his chest. He wouldn't want the others to notice.

 

“I’m one of Wakaba’s friends” the voice Shido is using makes Akira  _ sick _ , he sounds so soothing, like he’s not the same person that has ordered hundreds of people to death, or the person that is, at this moment, manipulating a  _ child. _

 

“Really?” Goro’s voice and posture hitches up, does an association to Wakaba instantly give a person points? Just who took care of him before her for Wakaba to have that much power in his mind? Glass shards and scattered cans flash in quick succession behind his eyes, oh, right.

 

“Yes. I’m terribly worried about her,” a flash of recognition flits through Goro’s eyes. Every reaction just leaves Akira with more questions.

 

“Why are you telling me this?”

 

“Because, I think you can help her”

 

“I can?”

 

“Her shadow is the heart of her pain, isn’t that right?” 

 

Goro looks confused at the sudden question but slowly nods.

 

“Then what would happen if you got  _ rid _ of her shadow?”

 

“It would… make her pain go away?” Akira watches as the boy comes to this conclusion and he wants nothing more that to yell, to tell him that that’s not right, that killing her shadow would only hurt her, but the now familiar weight of this palace is settled into his bones. He can’t move.

 

“That’s what I think too, will you save her?”

 

“I will! You can count on me!” Goro’s smile is so bright in that moment and in the very next it’s gone, just like that. The room flickers around him until nothing but a void surrounds them. Goro is alone, the cognition of Shido gone. His eyes shine in the darkness as they stare blankly forward.

 

“Isshiki Wakaba killed herself. You’ll be going back to the orphanage” a voice comes from nowhere, assaulting Akira’s eardrums with a deafening clang.

 

whispers ring out in the void, “I wouldn’t be surprised if he drove her to do it,” the voice is haughty, even as a whisper.

 

“Don’t say those kinds of things around the kids, what if you get reported?” Joking concern at best, Akira can see the boy flinch, their words still reaching his ears beyond the fog in his eyes.

 

Akira watches as the boy morphs in front of him, he becomes thinner, a smidge taller, his clothes are worse for the wear and the bruises that were so pleasantly absent dot his skin once again.

 

Goro’s eyes fill with a broken kind of anger, his body trembling as the area around them prepares itself for the next scene. Shido reappears. 

 

“You’ll be living under my care from now on”

 

“You bastard! You think i’ll accept this after what you did?”

 

“Oh I know you will, after all, you wouldn’t want your little orange headed friend to meet her mother this soon, would you?”

 

“You...” His eyes widen at the mention of Futaba, despair so clearly etched into his body language he may as well be a book for Shido to read.

 

“I’m glad we can understand each other,” Goro says nothing, still staring at shido in horor.

 

“Working with you will be… Beneficial” a gross smirk spreads across his face 

 

* * *

 

They’re standing outside of leblanc when decides to confront her, “Are you alright?” his hand rests on Futaba’s shoulder, he never really had the chance to comfort her after Akechi revealed himself last time. Changing the hearts of the collective took priority and then… He has more regrets than he knows what to do with, enough that sometimes they settle in his throat until all he wants to do is scream and cry.

 

Akira’s so buried in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice Futaba move until she’s wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest, “I’m… not okay, I just found out that the kid I thought of like a brother killed my mom and I can’t even be  _ mad _ . Akira what  _ is _ this feeling? It hurts.” 

 

Loss, relief, despair, regret, it could be anything, in times like this Akira wishes he could feel what she does so he knew what to do, “Only you can figure it out ‘Taba,” he returns her hug, smothering her thoughts with affection, hopefully.

 

“When we were in there, you called the shadow ‘Ace’, what was that?”

 

“It was just a dumb nickname I gave him, back when he lived with us I mean”

 

“He lived with you?”

 

“Only for a little while, less than a year, but we were really close”

 

“What was he like when you knew him?”

 

“He was… Quiet, like he was worried that if he was too loud mom was gonna be mad at him, but sometimes he’d get this glint in his eyes and we’d talk for hours about anything and everything”

 

“Then one day he was just… Gone. Right after mom died. He didn’t even go to her  _ funeral _ ” 

 

“You really were left alone,”

 

“I kept wondering what happened to him but now that I know i wish I could forget” Her voice comes out a distressed whine, like she’s pushing back tears with all of her might.

 

Akira smooths down her hair, soothing her in the process “do you want Morgana to stay with you tonight?”

 

* * *

 

“So why did you ask me to stay behind, leader?” Goro says, bright a curious, like the bags under his eyes aren’t visible even under the stage makeup he wears.

 

“I noticed that you’ve been stressed, is everything okay?” The concern in Akira’s voice must give Goro the wrong idea because he’s quick to respond with a dismissal.

 

“Oh! I assure you it’s nothing that will interfere with the mission,” Akira can’t describe the look on Goro’s face as anything but  _ empty _ , his eyes don’t hold any of the warmth his smile conveys. 

 

“That’s not what I meant” 

 

“Then what, pray tell, did you mean” a smidge of true emotion shines through Goro’s mask, the barest hint of irritation, gone in a flash.

 

He pauses, “I’m worried about you” Akira pours as much sincerity as he can into four short words.

 

“Oh please, you don’t have to pretend to care,” A bitter smile.

 

“Pretend?”

 

“You don’t even know me, I blackmailed you, in case you forgot,” He says it like he’s trying to explain something simple to a child. Akira may as well be a child for how much he isn’t capable of following Goro’s leap in logic.

 

“What does that have to do with this?”

 

“It  _ means _ , you don’t have to keep up your little leader charade” 

 

“Akechi, I care about you, even if you don’t believe me” a light practically goes off above Goro’s head and he takes a step forward into Akira’s space. Akira can feel his face heat up as they breath the same air.

 

Goro reaches up and cups his cheek before smashing their lips together. 

 

Their kiss is hot and hard and everything Akira had ever wanted for his first kiss with Goro, sinking into it is easy.

 

But, something isn’t right, there’s a nagging feeling in his stomach that convinces him to break the kiss and push Goro away, breath out of rhythm from the brief kiss.

 

“What’s the matter, isn’t that what you wanted?” He looks so  _ confused _ , Akira can relate, though he suspects they’re confused for entirely different reasons.

 

“...what?”

 

“You clearly have other motives behind this discussion, was that not it?”

 

“You think I brought you up here to, what, have sex with you!?”

 

“What other reason could it have been?”

 

“Just listen to me for half a second and you’d know!”

 

“I am listening to you”

 

“Clearly not!” he pauses, taking a deep breath. He can’t let the stress get to him. Lashing out will only hurt him in the long run, “look, i’m sorry”

 

“You asked me if I was stressed but you clearly have something weighing on your shoulders as well,” wonder what that could be maybe? Certainly not the fact that he might die in a day or two.

 

“I think, we should pause this” he meets Goro’s eyes, “let's go out for ice cream after all of this is over, just the two of us”

 

“You never cease surprising me,”

 

“Does that mean you’ll come?”

 

“I will”

 

Akechi leaves quietly and Akira watches him go. His clock blinks ominously, twelve am, November nineteenth. 

 

The red numbers flashing rhythmically hold Akira’s attention even when the world fades around him, the attic of leblanc being covered with metal paneling and rust stains until Akira looks up and he finds himself in the engine room of Shido’s ship. His clothes have changed to match the scene in front of him.

 

“I have one last deal for you” despite the door between them and the weakness in Crow’s voice, Akira can hear him loud and clear.

 

“You won't say no, right?” He’s heard this before, thousands of times, in his sleep, when he’s awake, any time he’s not  _ moving _ .

 

“End this. Please. Change Shido’s heart” he did, he did, but it wasn’t  _ enough _ . 

 

“Crow! Dammit, how do we get this thing open?” Akira startles at Skull’s voice and breaks out of his reverie. 

 

“Joker  _ please _ !” the desperate edge in Crow’s voice slams the panic button in Akira’s mind, and just like that, even though he knows it’s just a dream, he finds himself responding anyway.

 

“Alright, I promise” his voice doesn’t waver. 

 

“Thank you and...  _ goodbye _ ”

 

“CROW” 

 

Two gunshots ring and the rest of the world fades away, Akira’s fist slams into the bulkhead with enough force that he hears a crack. pain lances through his hand and he looks down to find not his red gloves as he expected, but his bare hands, covered in blood and holding a smoking gun. He can’t drop the gun fast enough.

 

Red, so much red, it’s under his nails, staining them and the rest of his skin the same sickening color. Scrubbing at them does nothing but smear and spread the stain like the oil paint Yusuke is so fond of.

 

“You killed me, didn’t you?” his head moves so quickly if he wasn’t panicking he would fear whiplash. Akechi Goro stands in front of him with  _ red _ staining his striped bodysuit. A world of white surrounds them, the only thing tainting it are the drops of blood falling from his hands, from Goro’s side, pooling on the ground, spreading.

 

“No I-” he didn’t, he didn’t, it was just the cognition. The blood on his hands isn’t  _ real _ but he can’t  _ breath. _

 

“If I hadn’t been injured there would be no reason for me to sacrifice myself, Isn’t that right?” cruel words poor out of Goro’s mouth with a smile on his face. The sound of his voice leaves a bitter taste in Akira’s mouth.

 

“You were trying-”

 

He doesn’t let him finish, “You even had the audacity to forget about me after causing my death” Goro walks silently, edging into Akira’s vision.

 

“I didn-” a finger is pressed to his lips before he can finish.

 

“You did, just like everyone else” Goro’s words sound almost  _ kind _ and his smile never falters. The bitter taste in Akira’s mouth doesn’t subside, it’s almost sickening at this point.

 

His hand moves from his mouth to his chin, tilting it up until Akira’s eyes meet his crimzon gaze, “So Joker, how are you going to repay me?” Goro wouldn’t… he wouldn’t ask that. Would he? That must be the sick feeling and bitter taste. This isn’t reality.

 

“You’re just in my head, this isn’t real” his words are labored, like poison is flowing through his veins, keeping him still, keeping him quiet.

 

Goro laughs, and it’s the same laugh that Akira has heard him use during interviews countless times, suddenly Goro’s hand is gone from his face, now holding a gun. The same gun he dropped.  “I think you’ll find i’m  _ very _ real” 

 

he raises the gun until it’s pressed against Akira’s forehead, the world shifts around them until Akira is back in the interrogation room, the cold metal chair digging into his burning bruises. “Goodbye, Joker”

 

His finger tightens around the trigger and the last thing Akira sees is Goro’s fake smile turning cruel.  
  


* * *

 

When Akira’s eyes shoot open in his room above leblanc he can’t help up tense, waiting for the next image his brain has cooked up to torment him with, his phone sits next to him innocently, before he can think his hands have grabbed the phone and hit the call button. He has to be okay, please be awake, please answer the phone,  _ please _ .

 

_ “Akira?” _

 

* * *

 

When Goro wakes up in the middle of the night it’s thankfully not because of a nightmare, this time. Instead it’s to the sound of his phone ringing. The glare from the screen burns his eyes and it takes longer than usual for them to focus. Kurusu Akira is calling, Akira? What could he need at this hour?

 

“Akira?” he can’t help the tiredness in his voice, thankfully Akira doesn’t seem to be in any state to notice.

 

_ “Goro, thank god” _

 

“Is something wrong? Are you okay?” Goro’s not sure he’s ever heard Akira’s voice as shaken as it is now.

 

_ “No everything’s fine, you’re alright” _

 

“ _ I’m _ alright? Akira what’s wrong”

 

_ “It’s stupid,” _

 

“Clearly not if it affected you enough you felt the need to call at…” he checks the time “Three AM, gods Akira, what were you even doing at this hour to work yourself into a panic?”

 

_ “I was having a nightmare”  _ his voice sounds so quiet, like he’s ashamed.

 

Akira has nightmares? Still why would be be concerned about  _ Goro’s  _ well being? “A nightmare? Why did you…” the  _ call me  _ was left unvoiced. Nightmares causing enough panic that Akira felt the need to call him immediately. Nightmares  _ about _ him? “You were dreaming about me?”

 

_ “Like I said, it’s dumb” _

 

“I find it a bit flattering actually” 

 

Akira falls silent for a few minutes until Goro suspects he might have fallen asleep. The silence stretches on until he’s pulled the phone away to check that the call is still working, he has horrible timing as Akira chooses to speak.

 

_ “You’re really okay?” _

 

“I am. Can I ask what you dreamt? I’ve heard talking about it can help the dream fade faster”

 

_ “We were in a palace, or at least I think it was a palace, you were hurt” _

 

“Do you know whose palace it was?”

 

_ “I’m not sure, it looked like we were in an engine room, there was metal paneling everywhere and these giant doors, it was dark though so I couldn’t see much” _ Goro’s heart stops in his chest for a beat, he’s seen a palace just like the one Akira described,  _ Shido’s _ palace. It couldn’t be, Akira should have no connection to Shido. It’s just a coincidence.

 

“What happened?”

 

_ “We were ambushed” _ he can hear shuffling on the other end of the phone, _ “you told us to run and-” _

 

“And?”

 

_ “Sorry I can’t- I can’t talk about it anymore” _

 

What would he have wanted to hear after a nightmare, if he called someone? “That’s alright, you did a good job”

 

_ “Sorry, I woke you up didn’t I?” _

 

“No It’s fine, I was already awake” a white lie, one that falls from his lips without a trace of guilt.

 

_ “Still, it’s late” _

 

“Do you feel better? Enough to go back to sleep?”

 

_ “I think so, thank you for listening to me” _

 

“I may not be experienced at this friend thing but even I know that they’re supposed to be support you at your lows”

 

_ “Yeah... I guess you’re right, goodnight Goro” _

 

“Goodnight Akira”

 

The sound of the call ending has Goro falling back against his pillow. Akira worries about him? He trusts him enough to call him during one of the few times where his walls were lowered so far Goro could hear each emotion as it passed through his head?

 

His plan flashes through his mind. It’s just starting to gear up, the rumors of Okumura are spreading just as he planned. 

 

It would be unwise to become more attached than he already is, but he  _ wants _ to. He desperately wants to see how far he can go, how close they can become.

 

Maybe it would be okay to go just a little farther, to trust Akira just a bit. He can control himself.

 

He can.

 

* * *

 

_ “I hope you didn’t wait to long,” a polite smile and apologetic tones _

 

_ “No, I didn’t, my ice cream hasn’t even melted yet” _

 

“Hey Akechi,” Ice cream runs down Akira’s hand onto the floor, he doesn’t pay it any mind, he’s surely drawing attention in the crowded entrance, but he stays staring resolutely through the windows, watching for a head of familiar hair in the crowd below “didn’t you say it was rude to keep someone waiting?”

 

Akira’s heart clenches simultaneously with his hand, the fragil cone shattering in his bruised fingers. Pain lances through his ribs as he tenses, “Did you forget?” 

 

The last time he stood here next to the detective was only a few weeks ago, but Akira can’t remember what the detective was wearing that day. The only thing that comes to mind is a dark knight’s helmet and a striped jumpsuit. 

 

Despite the hood over his head, Akira’s sure that if anyone gave him more than half a glance, they would be able to see the dullness in his eyes, or the tear stains on his cheeks.

**Author's Note:**

> If you've gotten this far then I have to thank you for reading!  
> Have any questions? Want to tell me your favorite part? Just want to yell at me?  
> I'd love to see you in the comments!


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